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What the law says about the non custodial parent participating with doctor's appoinments and so forth?

Morristown, NJ |

I am the NCP w jnt custody. ex is very controling she does everything that is possible to exclude me from my son's life he is only 4. I want to participate with his lif.e take him to the doctor, to school, etc. she makes all docts appoinmts during my working hours. I ask her to do it after 4:30 so I can assist as well. She nevers cooperates. Now I told her I made an appoinment to take him to the dentist. SHe called the dentist and changed the appoinmnt at 3PM knowing that I am at work. What the laws says regarding my rights. I know that she cares for him as a primary CP, but I want to get involved too. Is that to much to ask to make the appnts after 4:30? Can I ask the judge to let me care of his dental appoinmentslike somehow share the care of our son.

Attorney Answers 4

Posted

If you have a court order stating joint legal custody, and the mother is the CP and the Parent of Primary Residence, then the PPR generally has the ability to control the times of appointments so that they are convenient for her life, and if necessary for her. However, you can ask the CP if she will accommodate your requests. You can also contact the doctor's offices and see if they will, at least, inform you when appointments are made so you may attend.

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Posted

thank you for your info. she is not wiling to compromise i asked her to pls make the appntms for sat or at 5pm so bith can go she said no. she said you ask for a day off i go if you like it good if not take me to court. but when i go the judge always is the same issue she is the cp. lawyer keep telling me oh no bith have same rights but the reality is that she makes most of the decisions

Lauren E. Caesar

Lauren E. Caesar

Posted

If you are represented by an attorney you should consult your attorney.

Posted

You need to retain counsel and have a consultation. You do not state whether or not there are any existing Court Orders or if you just have an informal arrangement. With Joint Custody, you have an equal say in everything that pertains to your son. Good luck.

If you found this Answer helpful, please mark it as "Best Answer" Please be advised that the answer above is only general in nature cannot be construed as legal advice, given that not enough facts are known. It is your responsibility to retain a lawyer to analyze the facts specific to your particular situation in order to give you specific advice. Specific answers will require cognizance of all pertinent facts about your case. Any answers offered on Avvo are of a general nature only, and are not meant to create an attorney-client relationship.

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Posted

but when i go to court she has more saying and control that me that is the reality as a cp parent she is the one that makes mor of the decisions my opinion as a father has less value only in paper says that we are equal but the reality is completely different

Posted

It sounds as if you need to consult an attorney to file a modification of the custody order so she lets you have more input in your son's life. A court order could help deter your ex from controlling the entire situation.

This answer is for informational purposes only. It does not establish an attorney client relationship.

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Posted

If you have joint custody, you are entitled to full participation in the medical and educational activities of your child. This includes involvement in doctors visits and determining the medical care to be provided (or not to be provided). The school should also be notified that you should receive all notices that a parent would receive. If any of this is met with resistance, then, yes , you will need to go to the Family Part of the County and file an application to memorialize these rights.

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Posted

thanks. On paper it says that I have same rights as the mother. However, I have filed motions to exersice my participation and I have explained that since she is the CP she has more power over me. For instance my opinion over who is the babysitter was disregarded by the court, my opinion regarding selecting a good doctor was disregarded by court. Bottom line ex said this is the doctor my son will use, this lady will care for my son, etc and that is how it goes. I placed my opinion and she write me back I do not care what you think I am the mother and care for him that's it, and the Court has givind her this power. SO my rights are not the same as the law says regarding joint custody

John Victor Dember

John Victor Dember

Posted

I believe you need a strong local attorney who can argue your case. Once a judge makes up his mind it takes a strong effort to change it. seek Counsel.

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