What the law says about primary residence parent sharing, discussing issues related to child nutrition, babysitting, and others.

Asked 10 months ago - Netcong, NJ

I have joint custody over our 3 yrs old child and never married his mom. I have some visits but our son spend more with her. Sometimes I ask her what food he eats, stop giving him too much candy, how can we do to make him eat vegetables, questions about babysitter etc. But mother responses is that she has no duty to be discussing this nonsense with me like nutrition, where he sleeps, etc and to leave her alone. Bottom line she gives me hard time for everything. What does the law says about this issue? Is she right that she has no duty to discuss this things with me? She is his mom I do not know another person to get some feedback from my son and If I call the babysitter; ex call me upset saying why I called babysitter. Is this enough ground for a motion?

Attorney answers (2)

  1. Amy B. Hansel

    Contributor Level 13


    Best Answer
    chosen by asker

    Answered . The day to day decisions (what the child eats, bed time, etc) are to be made by the parent who has custody of the child at that time. If she tries to control what you feed the child and you try to control what she feeds the child, the court would consider that micromanaging parenting time and that is frowned upon. While it would be nice to share if the child has a strong dislike or liking for a particular food, it is not required. Bigger decisions, such as educational and medical issues should be discussed and agreed upon, assuming you share joint legal custody. If you live close enough to your son and can be available to care for him during the times the mother hires a babysitter, you may want to file a motion for right of first refusal which, if granted, would require the mother to contact you first, before contacting a babysitter.

    This answer does not constitute the establishment of an attorney/client relationship nor is there any guarantee... more
  2. Curtis James Romanowski


    Contributor Level 13

    Answered . Day-to-day decisions affecting the child are for the parent who is parenting at the time to make without interference from the other. Unless her nutritional choices are causing health issues, these are up to her. Intact families serve a lot of junk to their kids, unfortunately.

    This answer is provided for educational purposes only. By using or participating in this site, you agree and... more

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Child Custody

Child custody involves decisions about who will be responsible for a child, including parental rights, for both married and unmarried parents, and adoptions.

Legal custody

Legal custody of a child means that a parent has legal authority to make religious, medical, or other significant decisions that affect a child's upbringing.

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