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What are the main reasons mothers lose custody.

Asheville, NC |

My ex husband is asking for full custody to keep me in state, I had requested to relocate. He only sees her every other weekend now. I have texts and phone calls from him saying I am fit. I have credit card statements showing he has spent 1500k at bars some months and goes to the liquor store some weekends when he has her, or is it the bar..his mom would keep her then. I'm just wondering what reasons do judges decide to take from primary care giver mom to dad

Attorney Answers 4


The best interest of the child is the primary concern in making custody decisions.

Every legal matter is fact specific, and there are often nuances in every case. This is intended for comment only, and does not create an attorney client relationship.

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Judges will change custody orders if there is a change in circumstance and it is in the best interest of the child. Buying thousands of dollars of booze isn't going to make a difference unless he is drunk in front of the child or is not otherwise providing for the child. You should have an attorney to answer these questions . . . If the father has an attorney, and you do not, you are likely going to have a very hard time succeeding in your case.

The information provided by Attorney Matthew V. Silva is based upon the generic and ambiguous facts presented in short questions. Without a full consultation with an attorney, you should not rely upon any information presented in this forum. The intricate facts of every case are different. The information provided is not legal advice and should not be the basis of any decision without the actual guidance of an attorney. Further, any information provided by Attorney Matthew V. Silva should not be perceived as a willingness to represent you or actual representation. If you would like to speak with Attorney Matthew V. Silva, please call Silva and Sweet, PLLC at 910-333-9833 or visit

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So if he is deciding to drink and party instead of spend time with his child that will not matter to a court, they could give full custody to someone who spends 1500k a month at a bar?


The statute in North Carolina states, "an order for custody of a minor child entered pursuant to this section shall award the custody of such child to such person, agency, organization or institution as will best promote the interest and welfare of the child. In making the determination, the court shall consider all relevant factors including acts of domestic violence between the parties, the safety of the child, and the safety of either party from domestic violence by the other party and shall make findings accordingly."

Unless your ex-husband's alcohol consumption creates a safety problem for your daughter, I doubt that it will be determinative for your custody case.

I would strongly recommend hiring an attorney for your custody case. Since the court will look at all relevant factors in determining custody, these types of cases are often complex and you will need an attorney to navigate the court system.

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When considering a change in custody there needs to be a change of circumstances and it needs to be in the best interest of the child. You should consult with an attorney if you have not already done so as these types of matters can be very complex. You need to present the best case possible and an attorney has the knowledge to help you navigate the court system in order to do this.

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