First, have it well documented so there's as little "grey area" as possible. Get a police incident report - at this point, I wouldn't say you want to press criminal charges (Look it up - NJSA 2C:29-9, contempt of court order, and NJSA 2V:13-4, Interference with Custody or Parenting Time); you don't want to appear more aggressive than is necessary (and it looks better with the police if all you're trying to do is document the incident... if it continues, they'll agree a summons is appropriate).
Anyway, return it to court via a motion - try to keep the anger level down, although you should express your frustration. I would ask for a modification requiring that each of you pick up the child. That way, she'll either drive and do the pick up or else.
IF YOU LIKE THIS ANSWER AND APPRECIATE THE TIME IT TOOK TO WRITE IT, PLEASE SELECT IT AS "BEST ANSWER." Thanks. The above is said without seeing your case file and without my understanding the entirety of the facts of your case. Depending on those facts, the above information be may incomplete or may be completely inaccurate. The above is intended as general information only based on what you described and not as legal advice. I advise you to consult with counsel who may be able to provide better information commensurate with a better understanding of your situation.
You have a few options to resolve this outside of filing a new motion with the court.
If you and your ex are able to agree upon the terms of the order you wish to change, you can draw up a consent order and submit that to the court. The court will enter the order and it will be signed by the judge to become a new enforceable court order.
If you think you could reach an agreement with a little help from a neutral third party and have no history of domestic violence (no active restraining orders), you can reach out to the court to schedule court provided mediation. Custody and parenting time mediation is provided by the court at no cost. If you reach an agreement in mediation, the mediator will prepare a memorandum of understanding.
Lastly, you have the option of filing a new motion with the court to address the relief you seek, which may require your participation in mediation depending upon the contents of your motion.
This response is not to be construed as legal advice and is provided for educational purposes only. This response does not create an attorney/ client relationship. The response provides general legal information and education. This response does not address any specifics concerning this inquiry, as the inquiry as written may have omitted details which would make the reply unsuitable. The inquirer is strongly encouraged to consult with an attorney in his or her own state to acquire more information about this issue. Licensed to practice in New Jersey and Pennsylvania.
Only a judge can hold a party in contempt. Just about any family law issue can be resolved out of court it's just a matter of how it can be done.
DISCLAIMER This answer is provided for educational purposes only. By using or participating in this site you agree and understand that there is no attorney client privilege between you and the attorney responding. This site cannot be used as a substitute for competent legal advice from a licensed attorney that practices law in the State where this offense is charged; and, who has experience in the area of law you are asking questions about and with whom you would have an attorney client relationship. The law changes frequently and varies from jurisdiction to jurisdiction. The information and materials provided are general in nature, and may not apply to a specific factual or legal circumstance described in the question, or in the State where this charge is filed
You may wish to try mediation but that may not work. You may have to utilize the authority of the courts by filing a motion to enforce litigant's rights.
Law Offices of Benjamin G. Kelsen, Esq. LLC 179 Cedar Lane Teaneck, NJ 07666 Phone: 201-692-0073/ Fax: 201-692-0151 Web Site: www.kelsenlaw.com / Email: firstname.lastname@example.org NOT LEGAL ADVICE: The above information may contain an opinion which does not constitute legal advice. Unless a retainer agreement has been signed, we are not your legal representatives, and you should not rely on any opinions contained in this message.