under WA family law can a child decide which parent to live with

Once the child reaches the age of discretion (which is different for each child --there is not set age), the child may express their wishes to a third party for the court to consider in making a ruling regarding custodial arrangements. A child's wish is never dispositive. If there is a parenting plan already in effect the only person who can chakge that PP is a trial court. If you want to modfy the PP to reflect a child's wishes, the process would be to file a Peition to modify the PP and get a Guardian ad Litem appointed to make a recommendation to the court which may include the child's desires. Absent this procedure, if the parties knowingly stray from the PP, that party may be in contempt of court for not following the PP which is a court order. You may also agree to modfy the PP reflecting the child's wishes and present it to the Judge, but the Judge does not have to sign it because the Court's first obligation is protect the bests interests of the child, So, to answer the question, you need to follow the PP in effect to protect yourself against a potential contempt action until that PP is modified.

Since the children are almost at the age to enter college, some practical considerations likely should be taken into account. Do the children want to go to college? Where do they want to attend? For public colleges and universities, tuition for in-state residents often is much less than tuition for out-of-state residents.

Besides the money issues, being local or out-of-state may affect the chance of being admitted into a particular university.

The court of which state has jurisdiction is not clear from your facts. If the most recent court orders are from WA, WA courts may still be the courts to decide.

You may want to review your facts and legal options with an attorney.

this is a fairly complicated question. you really to need to sort it out with an attorney. if you bring all documents related to the case to an attorney for an office visit, you could probably sort out the jurisdictional issues on the spot.

the first question is which court has jurisdiction. the court that entered the parenting plan will have continuing exclusive jurisdiction over the children until jurisdiction is changed. the factors a court will consider in determining whether to change jurisdiction are:

1. length of time the children have lived in the jurisdiction where presently found (no change if the children have lived in new jurisdiction for less than 6 mos.)
2. agreement of the parties
3. the first party to file
4. the jurisdiction that is most convenient to witnesses (e.g. where do the children's soccer coaches, pastors, counselors, etc. live?)

the next issue is whether there has been a substantial change of circumstances in the household of the non-moving party. A WA court will not grant a pet. to modify unless you can meet above criteria. a subs. change in circumstances is a big deal. the other side becomes a meth addict, marries a wife-beater, etc.

maybe if the children go to the police station and refuse to leave until they are returned to to their mother, that would be enough, simply expressing a desire to live w/mother might not be. they would have to drop out of school, start doing drugs, etc.