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Temporary restraining order and child custody

Riverside, CA |

The mother of my daughter recently filed for a restraining order against me and included my daughter in the order. She has done this before. We've been separated for about six years and have joint custody. Last time we had a legal scuffle is when I sued her from a loan she never repaid about two years ago. She counter-sued me for harassment but the judge told her it's not harassment when I'm just trying to see my daughter and she's making it unnecessarily difficult ( I won). She's playing the same games again except the last time she filed an ro it was just for her so I didn't bother messing with it. This time it includes my daughter. How should I go about getting my daughter back? Is there any way to get court dates moved up so I can my rights reinstated?

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Attorney answers 2


You need to appear at the hearing on the TRO and fight the TRO. You cannot let it become a restraining order. You should not have permitted the other TRO to become a restraining order, as that could have repercussions even now. The TRO should only last about 21 days. I suggest you contact an attorney in your area to get some advice, without knowing the allegations in the TRO, I cannot really advise you as to what you may need to worry about at the hearing.

NOTE: This answer is made available by the lawyer for educational purposes only. By using or participating in this site you understand that there is no attorney client relationship or privilege between you and the attorney responding. Do not use this or any answer by the responding attorney as a substitute for competent legal advice from a licensed professional attorney practicing in the area in which your question pertains with whom you have an attorney client relationship. The law frequently changes and will be different from state to state. The response provided above is general in nature, and is based solely on the facts provided in the question. Fact not included in the question may have a bearing on the response.



Thanks for the response. The RO is over an argument we had. She told me my daughter wanted to see me even though it was not my day to have her but I could come pick her up anyway. After driving all the way down (about a 30 minute drive because she keeps moving further and further away) she changes her mind and says she wants to keep her. Naturally an argument ensued my daughter was upset then I left. A few weeks later on my scheduled day she tells me my daughter is a sleep and to just leave her. Another arguement, she calls me an inappropriate name, i throw one back and her older son (not mine, over 18) comes running out swinging. Him being a lot smaller, I grab and restrain him until the police arrive. No arrest made and since i didnt bring my court papers was forced to leave without my daughter. the next week i get served. Paper work says i wasnt notified in advance because she feared retaliation.


A domestic violence restraining order against a parent creates a presumption against that parent having legal or physical custody of his/her child, whether that restraining order sought to restrain your contact with the other parent alone, or with the other parent and the child.

It was thus a mistake for you not to have opposed the prior domestic violence restraining order application, because it appears that you allowed the mother to obtain unopposed domestic violence restraining orders against you.

If she has sought new domestic violence restraining orders against you, there is a risk that the conduct she alleges you committed against her may provide grounds for her or the county to seek remedies against you for contempt of court, as well as grounds to restrain your contact with your daughter and/or require your visitations with your daughter to be supervised by a professional visitation monitor at your cost.

You should retain an experienced Family Law Attorney to represent you.

The return hearing on the TRO was likely set within 25 days of the date of the TRO, and it is unlikely that you or an attorney could advance that hearing, given the state of congestion of the Court's calendars.

Your Family Law Attorney would need whatever time is available to prepare for the domestic violence restraining order hearing, including reviewing the prior domestic violence restraining orders, reviewing the application for the new domestic violence restraining orders, preparing your testimony, preparing to cross-examine your daughter's mother, interviewing witnesses to the alleged events, etc.

Please note that this answer does not constitute legal advice, and should not be relied on, as each situation is fact specific, and it is not possible to evaluate a legal problem without a comprehensive consultation and review of all the facts and court pleadings filed in the case. This answer does not create an attorney-client relationship.



Thanks for the advice. If I hire an attorney and she cannot afford one, is there any possible way I could be on the hook for the cost of her attorney fees if she hired one any way?



i dont think so in this case.

Donald Frederick Conviser

Donald Frederick Conviser


It is possible (depending on the disparity of your and her incomes), but it is worth the risk due to the affect of DVROs, even if only against the other parent, on custody matters.

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