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Summer visitation. In pendente lite order the judge ordered 2 weeks for the non custodial parent which are not to be consecutive

New York, NY |

Non consecutive parent already gets every other weekend,so now the two weeks he wants is which include my weekends and other 5 days of the week, and he wants to get his previous weekend and the weekend after as usual( coz children go to him every other weekends)
I think it's unfair coz this way he gets 4 weekends in a row and I don't get to spend weekends with my kids.
So my question is how is generally these 2 weeks of summer visitation handled, should it include his weekends and the continuous rest of the weeks or the whole week has to be with my weekend and his visitation goes on as usual? Apart from this nothing else in mention in the pendente lite and it's a divorce which is based on cruelty and domestic violence, he has already gotten a warning to not use children as pawns, age 8 n 3

Attorney Answers 6


  1. Review the visitation order with your attorney who has all the details to slow an opinion. Was pendente lite resolved by a stipulation or an order or is it pending?

    If this answer is helpful, then please mark the helpful button. If this is the best answer, then please indicate it. Thanks. For further information you should see an attorney and discuss the matter completely. If you are in the New York City area, then you can reach me during normal business hours at 718 329 9500 or www.mynewyorkcitylawyer.com.


  2. There are as many different ways to have summer vacations as there are couples in court. There is no "general" way. It seems there is a summer plan in place and that is a good thing for the child.

    Good luck.


  3. It sounds as though the pendente lite order is a bit vague. I agree you should not be deprived of 4 weekends in a row & if the order doesn't otherwise specify, then offer a compromise position. If he still does not agree, then either of you may file a motion with the Court (perhaps an alternative, if permissible by the individual Judge, is to have one of the attorney file for a "pre-motion conference" with the Judge's Law Secretary & see if s/he can resolve the issue short of a motion). For a full assessment, you're best advised to schedule a consultation with a NYC Child Custody attorney.

    * If you found my answer to be "HELPFUL," or the "BEST ANSWER," please feel free to mark it accordingly.


  4. I sometimes suspect that I am being too accommodating in my approach to these matters. While it is somewhat difficult to not have the children 4 weekends in a row, you as the custodial parent have the children the bulk of the time. Allow the other parent this "extra time" during the Summer. Fighting on this issue might make the Judge revisit the issue of which parent will be less likely to unreasonably frustrate the non-custodial parent's right of access.

    By the way, if you are represented by an attorney, disregard everything you read here, and take your attorney's advice. S/he is the person who knows the most about your specific case.


  5. First, the summer vacation schedule ordinarily trumps the regular parenting schedule. that being said, talk to your spouse if there are no outstanding orders of protection and be honest with hi/her about your concerns, especially if your children are very young. Second, the pendente lite access schedule is not permanent and you can agree in a final divorce agreement (assuming you will not have a custody trial) that summer vacation weeks are not continuous so that exactly the situation you are describing does not happen again.

    The cruelty and domestic violence that the divorce is based on has no impact on the financial or custodial issues UNLESS the domestic violence took place in front of the children, in which case you are likely to be headed down a road involving the Administration for Children's Services ("ACS"), and that is never a good situation.

    If you don't have a lawyer you trust, you may want to consider finding an attorney immediately,


  6. Generally his two weeks include one weekend belonging to each in a 'standard' 'typical' alternating weekend parenting schedule

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