Charges can be filed with the court, even if you are not arrested.
These are serious charges, with far-reaching consequences. Consult an experienced attorney ASAP.
Legal disclaimer: [In accordance with the Avvo community guidelines, this communication does not constitute "legal advice", nor does it form an attorney-client relationship.]
The police have broad discretion in their arrest decisions. Even on a domestic violence with mandatory arrest the Officer has discretion again after a certain amount of time. You may not have been charged earlier merely because they did not have the paperwork prepared yet. Contact an attorney right away. A DV charge can haunt your career, housing applications and life.
At your service,