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Next of kin rights to deceased person's headstone

Asked about 4 years ago - Memphis, TN

My father was married briefly to someone at the near end of his life after a 45 year marriage to my lateMy siblings and I paid for everything associated with his death, including preparation, service, flowers, transport, gravesite, vault, and headmarker, more than $25k. Now the second wife has reappeared after 18 months and demanded the gravemarker be removed because she didn't like it. The cemetery complied with her demand and removed the headstone, without notice to us, leaving my dad in an unmarked grave. She has no plan to replace the headmarker. The cemetery says their hands are tied because she has next of kin rights, but our attorney says that applies only to the disposition of the body. Who is correct?

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Sort of the same situation. Father passed away after a short marriage. Obviously she was the next of kin at the time of death however she has since remarried and divorced. She now wants to move my father's body. She does not own the burial plot. Would she still be the next of kin? Or would I? I am his oldest son.

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Attorney answers (1)

Craig Edward Kennedy

Reputation Level 14

Answered about 4 years ago. Family Law Attorney in Vancouver, WA.

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You'll need to first determine who purchased the plot and who purchased the headstone? If so, what do the contract terms recite? In other words, there is usually a deed holder to the parcel or plot. You'll need to determine if the stone was 1- a gift, 2- is now part of the plot site, or 3- is still owned by the purchaser.

Next stop is to contact the regulatory agency in your state regarding such matters. The Tennessee Department of Public Health is your agency.

Then, there should be a series of regulations that govern the cemetery and how it is managed. Check with the cemetery and the City it is in.

Once you have the confluence of ALL of this information, you can determine who has the lawful authority to remove the stone and manage the grave site.

If you find that something wrong has happened, you'll need to bring your action in a Tennessee equity court.

As always, get yourself a very good local lawyer!

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