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My girlfriend is being harassed/stalked/bullied by her ex. He text her months ago saying he'd kill me once. Who should file?

Frederick, MD |

my girlfriend is being harassed/stalked/bullied by her ex. She lives with me. He has texted her "saying screw him I'll kill him" once months ago; but never been after me. He did come to the house a few months ago looking for her and i said she was not here. I played the coward and just said you need to leave her alone. She suffers from ptsd/panic attacks/anxiety pretty bad from past relationships. I do know also that she has responded to his text before when he breaks her down mentally...which is fuel to the fire(
What is the best course of action? She keeps trying to tell me I should file a no contact order. Shouldn't SHE file the order and possibly file charges? Or should I also? She is so scared and noone sees whats going on but me(

Attorney Answers 4


  1. The sending of harassing emails and text messages is considered a criminal violation. Your girlfriend should report any such conduct to the local law enforcement. Your girlfriend should also 'BLOCK' any and all text messages from the offending telephone number.


  2. Call the police. The police are very well trained to handle these kind of threats. They will also explain to you and/or your girlfriend how to file for a peace order.


  3. As his ex-girlfriend, she may have the ability to file for a protective order or a peace order. You also have the ability to file for a peace order given the threats against your life. You should contact a local attorney to discuss your options.

    This is NOT legal advice, is GENERAL INFORMATION ONLY, and does NOT establish an Attorney/Client Relationship. Therefore my answer cannot address your specific legal situation and you should not rely upon my answer in your legal matter. I am an attorney licensed in Maryland.


  4. In addition to what has already been suggested, your girlfriend should also obtain a Domestic Violence Order of Protection. Once obtained she should carry that Order with her at all times so that she can show it to the police whenever she may need to. Since you live with her, you can also be named as a protected person in that Order of Protection. You do not say whether her ex is an ex boyfriend or an ex spouse. If your girlfriend is in the midst of a divorce, this behavior definitely should be brought to the attention of her divorce attorney and the judge in the divorce case by filing for an order of protection in that case. If she is too afraid to do anything at this point, you can do some research to discover where she could receive counseling near by you geared specifically toward victims of domestic violence and encourage her to participate in such counseling. This would be helpful to her even if she is ready to take legal action now. Once she is ready, she should contact an attorney to get the process rolling ASAP. Also, if she is suffering from ptsd, etc as a result of this man's past abuse, she may have a good chance at prevailing in a law suit for intentional infliction of emotional distress. If he was physically abusive, and there are any injuries that she still suffers from as a result -(I sincerely hope that this is not the case)- she may have other viable legal claims to pursue against him as well. In any case, the sooner she contacts the police and obtains an Order of Protection the better. It may allay some of her fear to know that she may qualify to obtain an Emergency Order of Protection without first notifying her ex. This order would last for 2-3 weeks during which her ex would need to be served, a hearing would be held, and then hopefully she would be issued a plenary Order of Protection which would be good for 2 years. In any case, she should alert the police IMMEDIATELY! I hope you both stay safe and find an attorney to help you with this matter ASAP.

    Please note that the provision of the above information is for general informational purposes only and is not intended to, nor does it any way serve to, commence an attorney client relationship. Furthermore, since the information provided above is based only upon the minimal information provided in the question answered, and an attorney advising the questioner would need to consider and have access to much more information than is provided in the question in order to properly represent and advise the questioner, the information provided above should not be considered to be authoritative and/or conclusive legal advice. Again, the information provided above is for general informational purposes only and no attorney-client relationship is created by the provision of this information.

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