My ex girlfriend is 9 weeks pregnant with my child. She is threatening to move to Wisconsin to keep me out of our child's life.

Asked 8 months ago - Chattanooga, TN

She has threatened abortion if I don't meet her financial and stability requirements. She has continually tried to get me to sign a waiver if rights for adoption or she will get an abortion. Her fear is that when the child is close to being born and it's time to make a decision on whether adoption is best for the child , that I will not sign away my rights because I want the child in my life. This is incorrect but these are her concerns. I understand I have no rights as far as abortion. I have not signed anything and believe she was using abortion to get as much control as possible. Now she is threatening to move to Wisconsin with my unborn child so I will not be in the child's life. Can she take my child away from me like this? What can I do to ensure my rights and stay in my child's life

Attorney answers (3)

  1. John David Drake

    Pro

    Contributor Level 7

    1

    Lawyer agrees

    Answered . I read this question and then clicked away because I thought it was too difficult to reply to quickly. I want to return you to my original thought. You are blessed to have a child come into the world. Find a way to be with the child despite not getting along with the mother. If she moves to Wisconsin, you move too. Not to stalk, badger or harass her, but to be close to where you can love, support and watch your child grow up. I am a father and I would not let poor choices by the mother stand in the way of parenthood. Be a man, be there for your child.

  2. Wilton A. Marble Jr.

    Contributor Level 11

    1

    Lawyer agrees

    Answered . I agree wholeheartedly with John Drake. Be a man. Be there for your child.

    However even if she moves to Wisconsin you do not necessarily have to move there also. If you can great. It will make it easier for you to spend time with the child. If you cannot move to Wisconsin you could file a petition to establish paternity and for a permanent parenting plan in Wisconsin. After the child's birth if paternity is established then the court would have to decide what kind of parenting time (visitation) you get with the child. You would probably get more time if you lived close to mother but even if you don't live close you should get some time.

    The answering of this question does NOT establish an attorney\client relationship. If you wish to hire me call me... more
  3. Camellia Saunders

    Pro

    Contributor Level 6

    Answered . The child will have to be born before your parental rights can be established. You can do a voluntary acknowledgement of paternity or take a DNA test. Either way, in the State of Tennessee there will have to be a court order signed by a judge legally declaring you to be the father of the child. The mother of the child may list you as the father of the child on the birth certificate although that in itself does not give you legally enforceable rights since the two of you are not married. However, once you are declared the legal father you will be able to ask the court for such relief as visitation, joint custody, and/or primary custody.

    Unfortunately, until that is done she gets to make all the decisions such as whether or not to move to Wisconsin with your unborn child. I would recommend that you file to legitimate the child as soon as it is born by filing a petition to establish paternity. An attorney will be able to help you do this. If you are the father then you will have the right to fight to be a part of your child's life.

    Any answers provided by Camellia S. Saunders does not create an attorney client privilege.

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