I was just served with a foreclosure notice in PA. Do banks typically come after people for lawyer fees, late fees, etc...

If you do nothing to defend the foreclosure and the property goes to sheriff's sale, then you will be personally liable for any difference between what you owe the bank (the unpaid mortgage, the interest, and all the penalties & fees, including lawyer fees) and what the property sold for. Banks generally don't bother to come after a person for this difference unless they think you have it, but they have the right to.

One way to make sure that you don't have any personal liability is to negotiate with the bank for a "deed in lieu of foreclosure" or a "cash for keys." Basically, this means you agree to sign the property over to the bank, they don't need to spend the money on the sheriff's sale and they agree to release you for any deficiency. In a "cash for keys" situation, you may be able to get the bank to pay you a little bit of money surrendering the property.

Finally, bankruptcy would be an option, but, given the situation you described, may not be your best option.

I'm not sure what you mean by the "meeting." I know in Philadelphia, the court has a mortgage foreclosure diversion program that requires a homeowner to meet with a housing counselor and then go to a court date for the foreclosure can go through. This program is limited to owner-occupied residential properties. I haven't practiced in Pennsylvania for about 10 months -- so maybe Bethelehem has a similar program (or maybe there's a state-wide program?). Even if it doesn't, see if you can meet with a HUD-certified housing counselor who might be able to help you negotiate a deed in lieu/cash for keys. You can also try to negotiate with the foreclosure attorney directly -- you will have to be persistent because most of them are extremely busy right now.

There's an excellent chance that your lender lost your letter surrendering the house. Even if it didn't, your letter would not legally give up interest in your house.