Hello! I would like to say "congratulations for your college acceptance!" Your mom or you can file for college contribution or child support but the fact that he resides in Ecuador may present some jurisdictional problems. Schedule a consultation with a family lawyer, so you can get a thorough evaluation of your situation. Many of us provide free consultations for students.
This answer is for informational purposes only and should not be construed as legal advice.
Normally you would be able to seek contribution for college from your father. However the fact that he is in Ecuador presents serious difficulties in actually getting anything from him. You may be able to get an order for child support here in NJ but getting it enforced in Ecuador would be difficult.
You should consult with someone familiar with international family law
This answer should not be construed as creating an attorney-client relationship, and is for informational purposes only, not legal advice.
You sound like a very bright, well adjusted teenager.
it is unlikely that he would want to take you away at this time due to his past history of absence.
If you are unsure speak to him directly ask him him intentions and state directly you are not interested in living with him. If you still have some trepidation do not meet him until you are an adult (18 o 17 depending on your State) when he can not legally do anything.
Providing general answers are meant to help the poster to understand some complex legal concepts and in no way creates an attorney-client relationship.