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I have 50/50 custody. We switch m/w/f at 6. My 2.5 year old says she doesn't want to go to daddys. I'm also having a new baby.

Greensburg, PA |

She came home saying she wishes her sister would go away... when normally she is excited about her coming. I think her dad is saying negative things. Please help. I need a new attorney to help me. I have been through 2 that use up my retainer fee from other atty calling and hasseling my attys at the time.

Attorney Answers 4

Posted

Custody litigation is a very expensive process and I hope you are successful in finding an attorney who can help you. If at all possible, you might consider using the services of a court certified custody mediator or working with collaborative attorneys.

I am not sure what it is you are trying to accomplish, but you should know that the wishes of a 2.5 year old, absent clear and convincing evidence of abuse, will go unheeded. Children of this young age often say things they think each of their parents wants to hear. You and your ex might consider co-parenting counseling to help your daughter during her adjustments.

In any event, most courts are finding shared physical custody to be best for children. Here in Montgomery County, the presumption is for 50=50 custody assuming both parents' schedules allow this.

Good luck.

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Asker

Posted

We have had 50/50 since she was 3 weeks old. We tried coparenting...it would not work or didn't plus it was expensive. I just want my daughter happy. I don't think he hurts her. But she gets a bath then puts her clothes on to go to his house. The putting on close is always a fight and when she starts the whining I don't want to go to daddys. This is very heartbreaking. Plus I think it is going to take a toll in an attachment of her new sister. She is very excited... but comes home saying things like I wish gabby would go away...something that just sounds as if her father is talking negative about her sister. I want more time with her other than 50/50 any ideas on how to get more than the 50/50. Or address the negativity that her father is putting in her brain?

Posted

Ultimately, the wishes of your 2.5 year old will have very little weight if any at all due to her age. The court looks at about 16 factors to see what is best for your daughter. Courts try to keep the relationship of the parents for the child, so aim for a 50/50 split. However, if it is clear there are issues that makes one parent unfit or not in the best interest of the child the court will take that into consideration. I would look to see if you can go through collaborative or conciliation so that you can agree without it going to a hearing and the Judge deciding what is best.

If you need help finding an attorney, call you local bar association, they will have referrals who can help. Depending on your financial situation they may be able to offer an attorney either pro bono or reduced fee. Best of luck!

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Posted

I handle custody cases routinely. I also have a sliding scale if you are lower income. Feel free to call.

Jack Puskar
Attorney at Law
Pittsburgh, PA
412-389-5502

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Posted

At 2 and half, she knows what mommy and daddy tell her. You should talk to daddy and explain the problem, that she says she doesn't want to go to her dad's and try to work together with love instead of lawyers.

Of course there are more details than what you have posted here, but chances of the judge saying she doesn’t have to go to dad's are slim.

You need honey, not vinegar to fix this, and yes, even with the "impossible" ex.

Good luck and congratulations on the new baby.

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2 comments

Asker

Posted

She is a smart girl who knows what is going on around her. He tried to steal her with an emergency petition at 3 weeks..... no 23 year old wants a brand new baby all the time. He asked for me to only have visitation rights. Her dad picked her up from my house... and he's like what kind of skates are those in a sarcastic way... she said they are my baby skates... they are to help her learn how to skate. He says what kinda helmet is that... I said its a princess helmet

Asker

Posted

He was making a remark because it had a visor build in. And I told him she picked it out it was between that and dora. I shouldn't have to explain to a 27 year old that you don't do that. Its not only not appropriate but its in our court order. There is only vinegar with a person that cuts down everything you do in front of the child they created together. She should have to visit dads.. but our custody schedule is not working she should not be there just as much time as she is with me. In time she will be able to choose and see who he is without me saying anything... because I don't tell her to not like daddys or not want to go to daddys. I tell her ill miss her and ill see her in how many days till she comes home.

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