How to prepare for child custody mediation

Asked about 4 years ago - Roseville, CA

My ex got a 1 year DVRO against me. i was ordered to take a parenting class and an anger management class, which I have now completed. Nothing in either of those classed prepared me for what I need for a new mediation to have the supervised visits made into unsupervised visits. my ex has not followed the courts orders, depriving me of visits. She has also moved in with a felon. Prior to that she moved in with her parents, who are the supervisors for my visits. They are now telling me that due to her conduct- they kicked her out of their house- that they will support me in the next mediation. She hates my mother, and has brought her up during our other mediations. The court ordered supervised visits for my mom, but she refused to cooperate, depriving my mom of being able to get a favorable

Additional information

recommendation from them. That supervisor has said that she will also send in a report documenting that. I know that I shouldn't be disparaging during the mediation, but I am unsure what I can or should say. I have looked at some fathers resources here, but they seem like scams.

Attorney answers (2)

  1. Gregory Paul Benton

    Contributor Level 20

    1

    Lawyer agrees

    Answered . There are no clear winners in this matter. Both parents appear to have inherrent problems regarding parenting this child. The court will award custody to the parent who is best able to make the child available to the non0custodial parent but your previous DVRO is problematic. I suggest that you spend the cash for an attorney on this.

  2. Leonard D. Weiler

    Contributor Level 6

    Answered . The advice that you should not be disparaging make sense. However, that does not mean that you cannot talk about the facts. I would recommend that you talk about the progress that you have made personally, and about your desire to be a good parent for your child. You should also talk about your relationship with your ex's parents and about how they are supporting you. Come with contact information for them; perhaps you can bring a letter from her parents. You can talk about the things that she has done that concern you, including her failure to allow court permitted visits, etc. Just don't use pejorative language to describe her. If the person she is now living with has a history that suggests potential harm to your child, you should bring that up as well. Most importantly you need to be thinking about the best interest of your child, and talking to the mediator about the best interest of your child. If your comments suggest that you're more interested in talking about the shortcomings of your ex, then about what your child needs and what you can offer, then you will not make a good impression.

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