How to deal with a collection agency for my son's mistake?

Debt collection agencies are not lawyers and lie through their teeth. It is possible if you use a lawyer you might be able to countersue them for a violation of the fair debt collection act. One of their tricks is non negotiable deadlines. Another is buying a debt written off by a creditor, and after all the original paperwork has been lost claiming they can sue on the debt. There is also the possibility your son was tricked into guaranteeing a debt when he had no idea whatsoever what he was doing.Drill into him never to sign a contract which has not been seen by a lawyer. You might benefit from reading some of the AVVO legal guides on debt collection. Also visit the website DefeatPresslerandPressler;it is about a NJ collection lawfirm, but the tricks they use are done by collection agencies all over the US.
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LEGAL DISCLAIMER
Mr. Sarno is licensed to practice law in NJ and NY. His response here is not legal advice and does not create an attorney/ client relationship. The response is in the form of legal education and is intended to provide general information about the matter in question. Many times the questioner may leave out details which would make the reply unsuitable. Mr. Sarno strongly advises the questioner to confer with an attorney in their own state to acquire more information.

Mr. Sarno is certainly correct that, as with any profession, there are those debt collectors that follow the rules and those that do not. As he covered that particular type of answer, I provide two additional comments. First, even if you pay the $3,000, your son may have a claim for reimbursement back against the person for whom he co-signed on the loan. Second, there is a valuable lesson to be learned from people actually being held accountable for their actions, including honoring contracts that they sign. Far too often today, people look to attorneys to get out of obligations that, were the situation reversed (such as your son loaned someone $8,000 and is now seeking to collect from the co-signer), those same people would take offense at efforts to avoid contractual obligations. That said, I reiterate Mr. Sarno's observation that various state and federal laws specifically govern the practices of debt collectors, and it may be worth exploring whether any such laws were violated.