One of the main differences between lay persons and licensed attorneys is familiarity with the legal system. Filing actions in compliance with the rules of the court is not "gaming the system."
The brutal reality is that until you retain counsel to protect and defend your rights in these matters, you will continue to be confused and feel victimized by those are licensed to know how the legal system works. That attorney can explain to you with particularity what has been "done to you," so far and assess you rapidly decreasing options.
Best wishes for an outcome you can accept, and please remember to designate a best answer.
This answer is offered as a public service for general information only and may not be relied upon as legal advice.