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How can I rewrite my current custody order?

Highland, NY |
Filed under: Family law

The current order was written when my son for a baby, a lot of things have changed since then. I wish to rewrite the current order by adding some stipulations into it and elaborating on some of the ones already ordered, We are currently involved with a separate court case and have to go to court at the end of the month. Can I rewrite the order we already have and present it to my lawyer? My ex likes to try and twist what's said in the order to fit whatever she happens to want. I wish to add in guild lines to follow. Would I need to file another motion for modification or can I present it at the current modification date?

Attorney Answers 4


  1. If you are in the midst of a modification proceeding, you can address the changes in this action. You may need to amend your pleadings.

    It is always advisable to contact an attorney. For a consultation, please contact our office at 516-669-3295. We are located in West Babylon, NY and proudly offer very low rates and free consultations. For more information, please see our website: <a href="http://www.LouisLSternbergLaw.com">Long Island Divorce Lawyer Louis Sternberg.</a>


  2. You can also go to mediation and work out some of the rough spots where you and your ex disagree and try to work out procedures for making visitation workable, and both sides can express their wishes and concerns to a neutral facilitator. It's typical for people to argue and "twist" terms in the orders to favor their positions, but why it's also equally important that the orders try to clarify the issues and procedures to be followed going forward so everyone knows what's expected of them and the order spells out how it should work so there aren't continuous arguments.

    As the children get older, they too have more "say" in these matters, and what they say to the Attorney for the Children about their wishes is more taken in to account.

    It's not unusual for exs to harbor anger and bad feelings about failed relationships, but the Family Court tries to focus on both parents cultivating as normal and full a relationship with the children and to get the parents to focus on those needs of the child rather than using the process to continue petty and selfish bickering with each other to settle scores and continue conflict.

    Mediation with a neutral facilitator can help parents who are not focusing on the child not to look at the process as a "win-lose" points scoring exercise but something that can help the children live as normal a life as possible. Sometimes, unfortunately, lawyers exacerbate this process to prove their value to their clients.

    This answer is provided under the Avvo.com “Terms and Conditions of Use” (“ToU”), particularly ¶9 which states that any information provided is not intended as legal advice or to create an attorney-client relationship between you and me or any other attorney. Such information is intended for general informational purposes only and should be used only as a starting point for addressing your legal issues. In particular, my answers and those of others are not a substitute for an in-person or telephone consultation with an attorney licensed to practice in your jurisdiction about your specific legal issue, and you should not rely solely upon Legal Information you obtain from this website or other resources which may be linked to an answer for informational purposes. You understand that questions and answers or other postings to the Site are not confidential and are not subject to attorney-client privilege. The full Avvo ToU are set forth at http://www.avvo.com/support/terms . In addition, while similar legal principles often apply in many states, I am only licensed to practice in the State of New York and Federal Courts. Any general information I provide about non-New York laws should be checked with an attorney licensed to practice in your State. Lastly, New York State Court rules (22 NYCRR Part 1200, Rule 7.1) also require me to inform you that my answers and attorney profile posted on the Avvo.com site may be considered "attorney advertising" and that "prior results do not guarantee a similar outcome".


  3. Your attorney is in the best position to advise you. They are, presumably, aware of all the facts and circumstances of your case. Ask them.

    I am not your attorney and any posts/messages or responses to posts/messages can not establish an attorney-client relationship. www.PatchogueAttorney.com You should not rely upon free legal advice and I disclaim any liability for the results if you do.


  4. I agree with the advice that you speak to your lawyer about this issue. While this site is fantastic for obtaining a broad range of information from experienced attorneys, it is always best to speak to your own attorney if you already have one. There is nothing more frustrating to me as an attorney than when a client does not want to take my advice because he has spoken to someone else---who is less familiar with the specifics of the case.

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