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Help.. what is a no negative contact order?

San Bernardino, CA |

Going through a divorce. The children's father continuously texts and calls them with constant negative and inappropriate "stories" about me. Now I have to let him have visits..What is a no negative contact order? Can I get one that will demand he stop talking negatively about me to our young daughters.

Attorney Answers 6


  1. I would need to see the context to be certain, but it appears the court is putting an order in place that makes it a violation to do just what you are describing. The negative "stories" about you constitutes (in my opinion) emotional abuse of the children, because they see themselves as half Mom.


  2. A no-negative contact order is not the same as a restraining order. A restraining order would require that your husband stay 100 yards away from you and have no contact with you. A no-negative contact order is much more limited, in that it simply means that you and your husband are not to have any negative contact with each other, i.e. no verbal or physical abuse or harassment, etc.


  3. What you are dealing with here is what lawyer/ therapist Bill Eddy calls an HCP. (High Conflict Personality.) The courts can't change these people. The links below have tools you can use, as you are stuck with this for the duration.

    Good luck!!

    Ms. Straus (aka Carroll) may be reached at 800-400-8978 during regular business hours, Pacific Time, or anytime by email at: ECSEsquire@AOL.com. All of Ms. Straus’ responses to questions posted on Avvo are intended as helpful information based upon the facts stated in the question, and are not to be relied upon as a final legal opinion. It may not be what you wished to hear, and it does not create an attorney-client relationship. Ms. Straus is licensed to practice law in California. If you would like to obtain specific legal advice about this issue, you must contact an attorney who is licensed to practice law in your state, and retain him or her. Me Straus provides “unbundled” services if you need specific assistance with a specific issue.


  4. Negative comments by one parent about the other parent to the children are wrong and courts will order that it stop. If the other parent disobeys the order to stop the negative comments it may support a modification of that parent's custody.


  5. Definitely, but you and the Judge may disagree as to whether the contacts are negative ones.

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