If the writing does not request or direct a third party to contact you vicariously, and or request a third party to forward any communication to you, there is no indirect contact. Essentially, the restrained party is not prevented from communicating about you, but rather communicating with you.
Notwithstanding, given that there have been prior incidents between you and the restrained party, which require the need for an Order, the letter may plausibly contain other actionable contents, such as defamatory (libelous) statements.
Indirect contact means asking a third party to contact you. For example, in a letter to your mom the woman says "Tell [poster] that I love/hate him." That is indirect contact. Her telling your mom that she hates you is not indirect contact because there is no request that the communication go to you. The issue is intent. She is free to contact anyone in the world about anything except you, the protected person in the order. She can tell them anything except a message directed at contacting you. She is allowed to tell them her side of the story, even if they communicate that to you. As long as she doesn't ask them to do so, she is abiding by the order. The fact that the family member gives you that information is a result of the family member, not at her request. If this becomes an issue, you can go back to court and attempt to show that she is doing this as an indirect form of communication. Just be aware that attempting to claim this will be difficult. You should consult with an attorney experienced with these types of orders and give them all the facts and your order to review and get their opinion on the next steps. In these types of cases, the details matter a lot and an attorney can help you with them.
If your partner or his family is on the restraining order, it would be a violation. However, indirect contact means a 3rd party contacts you on behalf of the restrained party, not the restrained party contacting other people.
However, that could possibly be construed as harassing conduct, which would be a violation of the restraining order.
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