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Asked 12 months ago - Havertown, PA
FlagWe separated 8 years ago. I am the custodial parent. He sees them every other weekend, but skips his visitation a lot. We have always had an arrangement where he has the kids Christmas Eve with his family and I have them Christmas Day with mine. This allowed us to keep in line with both our families Christmas traditions so the kids didn't miss either, and we both got to celebrate Christmas with our kids every year. Now he's remarried and his new wife is doing all she can to "get" me (her words). She wants the schedule changed to where he has the the entire Christmas Holiday one year, me the next. He's filed for a modification of the visitation. I can't afford an attorney. What do I need to do or say in court to prevent losing my kids at Christmas?
You need to think about whether the proposed change in the Christmas schedule is best for your children. I suggest that you list the good things about the proposed schedule and the bad things about the proposed schedule, but stay focused on how the proposed schedule affects your children. If it will benefit your children, then you should probably agree to the changed schedule. If it is not best for your children, then you must tell the court why it is not best for your children. You have created the list, to which you can refer.
Good luck, and I hope this works out for you and your children.
I am sorry that you family is going through this and my collegue who have you an outstanding answer was right to draw your attention to the "best interests of the children" Legally speaking you must abide by the separation/divorce agreemenent and if every year you have done the same thing then document it, either by using calenders or statements from anyone who has been there and make them into signed and notarized affidavits, bring that into court and ask that the current schedule be maitainted if that is what you want and argue it is for the continuity and best intests of the minor children. take care and hope that things work out.
There has to be a strong reason or basis to change what is already working with both families. The ages of the kids would be a big factor also. Perhaps this is an issue that can be mediated instead of litigated. If you will not hire an attorney I believe you need to arm yourself. Prepare as many notes about your past holiday traditions. Bring your mom and dad and sisters and brothers as witnesses as to just how important the yearly tradition is to your family. Put effort into your presentation and argument to the court. Best to you and good luck.
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