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Can marriage with a prenuptial agreement be a healthy relationship?

Atlanta, GA |
Filed under: Marriage and prenups

I would like prenuptial agreements before I get married. But I do not want my partner to think that I want prenuptial because I don't believe our marriage will work or anything. Even to me, the prenuptial agreement sound so business like. Not something that should become between love and family. I don't know if its a right thing to do or if it will hurt our future relationship?


Attorney Answers 4


Your question can't be answered by a lawyer. Only you and your fiance know if your marriage will succeed. But if you fear that a piece of paper will hurt your marriage, most counselors would tell you not to get married.

Prenuptial agreements can be very important in cases where parties bring significant assets into a marriage, or in blended families where one or both parties has children from before the marriage. Since the sad reality is that half of marriages end in divorce, it is prudent to consider a prenuptial agreement in many cases. If you do one, you need a lawyer. Ideally both parties need a separate lawyer.

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I think a pre-nup is just a logical extension of the honest and open communciation that's required for a relationship to work.

And as my colleague points out, if one of you has a lot more than the other, you might as well address that inequity and be upfront about taking reasonable precautions in case things don't work out as hoped.

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While prenuptial agreements used to be for only the rich and famous, over the years many people have entered into a prenuptial agreement as a matter of routine preparation for marriage. It is much more common than you may imagine. Simply put, it assures that, should the marriage end for any reason, the parties have already worked out the details of how that will happen while they are still in love and not being vindictive. It can actually be calming, while going through some marital discord, to know that your spouse is not scheming to gain an advantage in a divorce - that those issues have already been resolved by an agreement made at a time when you were both on the same page.

I am exclusively a family law attorney, practicing primarily in the metro Atlanta, Georgia trial courts. However, I handle appeals from anywhere in Georgia.

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"should the marriage end for any reason, the parties have already worked out the details of how that will happen while they are still in love and not being vindictive" You win the gold medal for common sense (obviously you are hated by gold diggers, both male and female.)


For something as important as your future life together, it may be wise to consider doing some or all of the following: 1) speaking to an attorney about why you want the prenuptial agreement - so that he or she can get a clear picture of whether what you are seeking is an agreement in contemplation of marriage, divorce, death, or some combination thereof and advise you accordingly and 2) if you and your fiance are going through pre-marital counseling, speaking with the marriage counselor about this issue, so that he or she can help you work through any tension surrounding your desire to have a prenup and your fiance's opposition to it (should he oppose the idea); and/or 3) speaking with your (if you have one) individual therapist about why you want the prenup and whether he or she believes that moving forward with one or in the absence of one may have an impact on your psychological wellbeing to the deteriment of your relationship with your future husband and/or 4) speaking with your minister, rabbi, or other spiritual advisor (not about the terms of a prenup - which you should definately discuss with an attorney) about your concerns with how a prenup may or may not impact your marriage. When it comes to the terms of any prenup, should you decide to go forward with one, you should absolutely seek the advice of counsel. Congratulations on your pending nuptials. Best of luck to you.

This answer is offered for informational purposes only. It is not offered as nor does it constitute legal advice. This answer does not constitute an attorney-client relationship. Do not rely on this answer in prosecuting or defending against any criminal or civil legal action. Speak to an attorney in your area about how to protect yourself and your interests.

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