In most states you may not take the child out of the state once the action has been filed, without a court order permitting it, or written permsision of the other parent. The best thing to do would be to communicate with the other parent, the nature and information related to the trip. You could do this via email, and obtain the other parent's consent. If the trip is reasonable, and the other parent withholds their consent, then you will have that evidence to present to the court when you request the court to give you and order to go on the trip. Generally, at age 13, the court will consider the wishes of the child in making any orders for custody or visitation, but every state, county and particularly each judge is different in how this should be accomplished and how much weight the views of a 13 year old should be given. You should contact someone in your area who practices exclusively family law for a consultation on the specifics of your local court. You can check with your state bar association or the local chapter of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers (AAML).