Can i sue my wife and her "partner" for alienation of affection in illinois?

Asked over 2 years ago - Chicago, IL

About a year ago, I found out my wife was cheating on me with a coworker. I left the house that same day and we’ve been separated ever since.

Now I find out that she’s parading him around town around all of my friends and she’s openly bringing him around our 2-year-old son (to family events and festivals). This guy is also living with someone and has kids (not sure if he’s married). I’ve been giving her $80 a week for my son even though I’m not obligated to.

This has all caused me a great deal of pain and suffering and it has completely destroyed my life. I lost EVERYTHING. She has the house, furniture, and most importantly, MY SON. I’m 30 years old and living with my parents (sad, I know). I feel so stupid. They are stepping all over me and embarrassing me. CAN I LEGALLY GO AFTER THEM IN IL?

Attorney answers (5)

  1. Robert Jeffrey Long


    Contributor Level 14


    Lawyers agree


    Answered . Just get a competent divorce attorney and forget about filing a case like this. Theoretically, you can file such a case, but they never go anywhere and just make the emotional cost of all this even worse on you and your kid.

    Bring this to a proper conclusion in divorce court, establish the rules of support, custody and visitation that will guide you and your son through the coming years, and then focus on the future.

    Nobody can play you for a punk unless you let them, and the easiest way for that to happen is to let her boyfriend live in your brain rent-free. Go get a good divorce lawyer now.

    Please be sure to mark the best answer to your question. My answers are general and do not form an attorney-... more
  2. David Matthew Gotzh


    Contributor Level 20


    Lawyers agree

    Answered . Just file for divorce and move on.

    Why spend thousands on a lawsuit that rarely wins? (You have to show actual damages, and hurt feelings don't count.)

  3. Michael A. Meschino

    Contributor Level 13


    Lawyers agree


    Answered . Of course you can, but you need to find an attorney who is willing to take on this type of case. Alienation of Affection is limited to pecuniary loss only. There are no damages for pain and suffering.

    So you need to ask yourself how much money did you lose because of the affair, and is it worth to sue this guy? You cannot sue your wife.

    Find a family attorney and divorce the philandering wife. Make sure the Petition mentions the guy and sue on grounds of adultery. Then have your attorney take his deposition.

  4. Judy A. Goldstein

    Contributor Level 20


    Lawyers agree


    Answered . Alienation of affection cases are rarely won in Illinois. They are also expensive.

    It sounds like you have not yet even gotten divorced. That is what you should be doing, as well as addressing the issues of your son.

    You need a lawyer right away. By your own admission, you have already wasted a great deal of time.

  5. Christopher Daniel Leroi

    Contributor Level 20


    Lawyer agrees

    Answered . Mr. Long is absolutely correct.

    I would concentrate on getting a good divorce attorney, but forego "going after them" and "seeking revenge," and just concentrate on being rid of your wife.

    The information provided in this answer does not create an attorney-client relationship. If you are interested in... more

Related Topics


Divorce is the process of formally ending a marriage. Divorces may be jointly agreed upon, resolved by negotiation, or decided in court.

Alienation of Affection: Suing a Third Party for Interfering with Your Marriage

Alienation of affection is a lawsuit brought by one spouse against a third party who he or she feels has interfered with their marriage.

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