Can I sue my church for denial of tithes and offerings I donated which surpass what I need to secure a private attorney?

An interesting idea, but I think your church would argue, and a judge would say, that what you gave to your church were unconditional donations, and you can't ask for it back now just because it's acting like the tax-exempt, lawless, power-hungry, woman-hating, money-grubbing institution it's probably always been.

Disclaimer: Please note that this answer does not constitute legal advice, and should not be relied on, since each state has different laws, each situation is fact specific, and it is impossible to evaluate a legal problem without a comprehensive consultation and review of all the facts and documents at issue. This answer does not create an attorney-client relationship.

It seems very unlikely that a Court would entertain the return of tithes to a church. Here are some of the legal principles that govern this issue.
As a matter of statutory law, gifts cannot be revoked. Civil Code section 1146 provides that "A gift is a transfer of personal property made voluntarily, and without consideration." Civil Code section 1148 provides that "A gift, other than a gift in view of impending death, cannot be revoked by the giver."
This rule of law is applied most stringently to charitable dispositions. As noted in Estate of Dwyer, (1911) 159 Cal. 680, 687 "[I]t is well settled here that dispositions to charity are looked upon with favor and courts will uphold all such gifts whenever made by a donor in his lifetime or by a trustor, when it can be done consistently with the rules of law."

Here is a link to domestic violence shelters in California. They may have some ideas about how you might be able to get assistance with your situation.

Ms. Koslyn's answer is superb!