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Can i a 18 year old ONLY date a 12 almost 13 year old with parent concent

Seattle, WA |

a "lady friend" and i want to start dating with absoultly no sexually contact of any kind her mom says its ok but her older sister of my lady friend says no i will go to jail if it is just dating is it legal for me an 18 year old to date a 12 almost 13 year old

dating as in boyfriend and girlfriend

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Attorney answers 4

Posted

What doing you mean as dating? Being friends and hanging sure no problem except 18 and 12 years enjoy different things typically.

My response to your question is a generic response and should not be construed as controlling to your case. I can not effectively advise about your case without knowing all the facts. Additionally, my response does not create an attorney-client relationship. You can contact my office to schedule an appointment if you would like to have me represent you.

Posted

If this is something that you are seriously considering, I belive that you may need to speak with a psychologist. It is difficult for me to understand how someone that is 18 has similar interests to that of a 12 or 13 year old. If the interst is sexual, that is even more disturbing as it would indicate more serious issues. If this is a serious question, you need to speak with a Dr and not an attorney.

Asker

Posted

OK we share commont interests just like any other relationship would and intercourse is some thing we both frown appon so again are we allowed to be in a relationship or not leagally with parent concent

Michael Lawrence Doyle

Michael Lawrence Doyle

Posted

Statutory rape requires a showing of sexual contact. If that is not present, you did not commit statutory rape. However, you could be in jail awaiting trial to get see whether jurors believe no sex occurred. Parental consent is neither here nor there. This attraction borders on pedophiliac and is very unhealthy.

Asker

Posted

Right and i see what you are saying her mother is ok with us being together and nothing sexual will ever take place and all i need to know is if i will go to jail if i have a relationship with her

Michael Lawrence Doyle

Michael Lawrence Doyle

Posted

Her mother's consent means nothing in the eyes of the law. If there is no sex, it is not statutory rape. I will not go as far as saying that you will not get into trouble. If the investigators find this relationship ongoing they may believe it is more than it is. After much money and some possible jail time you may be able to raise a reasonable doubt. In other words, even if it is not illegal you are still putting yourself in a very dangerous position. I can't be any clearer than that.

Donna Eugenia Vasilkovs

Donna Eugenia Vasilkovs

Posted

I agree.

Posted

No sex no legal problem though I don't know how smart the relationship is.

Donna Eugenia Vasilkovs

Donna Eugenia Vasilkovs

Posted

Sex is more than intercourse. It includes, in WA, any sexual contact for either party's sexual gratification, no matter how insignificant (like touching breasts outside of layers of clothes).

Benjamin J Lieberman

Benjamin J Lieberman

Posted

I suspect that would depend on which offense is being contemplated but I do agree.

Donna Eugenia Vasilkovs

Donna Eugenia Vasilkovs

Posted

Yes, I agree with your assessment as to the exact offense, but any sexual offense in WA, other than the misdemeanor of Assault 4 w/ Sexual Motivation, requires onerous, mandatory conditions upon conviction. It's not worth the risk. What if there is a loss of interest, an ensuing break up, and she accuses the poser of the question w/ some type of offense in retribution or in a vain attempt to "get him back?" I have seen worse in divorce/custody dispute cases! It's just not worth it, as all of us attorneys agree.

Benjamin J Lieberman

Benjamin J Lieberman

Posted

Well said. I couldn't agree more.

Donna Eugenia Vasilkovs

Donna Eugenia Vasilkovs

Posted

Thank you.

Posted

I am going to be totally candid here, because you don't need legal advise, you need some common sense.

Just picture your life for the next 10 years plus as a registered sex offender. I am not sure of the specific laws in your state, but you will most likely have to register as a sex offender. Your name and offense will be listed on many websites, including links to maps of your place of residence. Your family, friends and neighbors will probably all find out you are a sex offender. Your employment opportunities will be severely limited. Your marriage hopes may be dashed. If you have children, their friends will not be allowed in your home. You will have to check in with law enforcement frequently. You may not be able to have a gun permit. The list goes on and on.

You are thinking right now, but I am not a sex offender, there is no sexual contact. It does not matter. Even the accusation that sexual contact has occurred could ruin your life. Do you have the resources to fight an accusation or criminal charge that you have had sex with this girl, whether consensual or not?

You are an adult. She is a child and will legally remain a child for several years. I can't personally fathom why you think dating this child would even remotely be a good idea.

Remember this is just my opinion and should not be construed as legal advice. No attorney-client privilege will be created by communications on this website or by email. You should consult an attorney in your area about the specifics of your case.

Donna Eugenia Vasilkovs

Donna Eugenia Vasilkovs

Posted

In WA state, the age of consent is 16. Therefore, any sexual contact for sexual gratification will lead to sexual charges that the consequenses for which, as stated by the other attorneys, are very grave. You can never get this off your record, period. You will have have job and living restrictions, mandatory sex offender treatment, etc. I suggest finding someone your own age, older, or no more than 2 years younger; i.e., a 16 year old. Anyone you date or hang with who is younger than that subjects you to all of the above serious ramifications, despite parental consent. The consent is totally invalid. I had the exact same situation in a Pierce Co. case wherein the parents naively brought their "permission letters" from both parents to show the judge and prosecutor at the arraignment before I was appointed as counsel. The letters were later prepared to be used as prosecutorial evidence against the defendant, and the parents were all on the prosecutor's witness list for trial to testify against the defendant. Luckily I was successful in reducing the charges to a non- sexual charge, but it was not easy. Listen to all of us who answered-- STAY AWAY FROM HER UNLESS YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO ATTRACTION TO HER, and if that is true, consider your judgment, or lack thereof, your maturity level, or your competency in desiring to hang around someone that much younger than you. Later in life, such as your 30's and 40'S, that age difference becomes inconsequential, but not during these childhood development years.

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