He kept his marriage a secret enlisting our children and his family, to not utter a word about it, and then informed by text that he was now married! I didn't know he had even met someone let alone was engaged. Is it legal to not know anything about the stepmother who will have kids 50/50 of the time?
There's nothing illegal about not telling you in advance of his re-marriage unless the provision requiring such disclosure was in your divorce papers. It would be highly unusual to have such a provision in an agreement. If you object to your children spending time with their step-mother then you need to file a petition to modify your divorce agreement. If you have a right of first refusal in your agreement, then you could invoke it whenever your ex is not available to care for the children for the requisite period of time.
Unless there was a provision in the Joint Parenting Agreement or divorce decree covering it, then its likely it was not contemptuous or illegal. Illegal, no. Bad parenting, I'd say yes. You could try to find ways to interpret his enlisting the children in keeping the secret or facts into possible violations of some part of the JPA, but the unfortunate truth is that you will never be able to litigate him into being a better person or parent.
Doesn't have to.
Behar Intl. Counsel 619.234.5962 Kindly be advised that the answer above is only general in nature cannot be construed as legal advice, given that not enough facts are known. It is your responsibility to retain a lawyer to analyze the facts specific to your particular situation in order to give you specific advice. Specific answers will require cognizance of all pertinent facts about your case. Any answers offered on Avvo are of a general nature only, and are not meant to create an attorney-client relationship.
He does not have to but there is a giant problem in your family right now that should be addressed or it will get worse. I suggest counseling.
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