Amicable TN divorce. Ex convinced me our lawyer/friend wd mediate so we wdn't have to pay for 2 attys. Now, I feel like a dummy!

Asked about 2 years ago - Portland, OR

Took 17 yrs for me to realize why our friend the lawyer asked if I was sure I didn't want my own lawyer. He didn't mention he was representing my husband of 20 yrs bc he didn't know he was "mediating." I agreed to give up said husband's pension! Where was my lawyer? Yikes. Is there any chance this deception could invalidate the agreement? I feel like i was mugged.

I know how ditzy or even stupid I sound - but I was in a state of shock at time. Just want to know if I should even research this, let alone pursue it. Thank you for replying.

Thank you,
Arbitrated

Attorney answers (3)

  1. Sarah C Easter

    Contributor Level 9

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    Best Answer
    chosen by asker

    Answered . Trying to change the terms of the agreed divorce 17 years later is, unfortunately, nearly impossible. Most of the time, the agreements that are signed warrant that you understand what attorneys are representing which party and that both ides have made full disclosure. Further, even if you could base the change of fraud or mistake, that normally must be filed within one year from the date of judgment. Filing such a petition now would be n expensive proposition that would more than likely not result in any relief for you and could even result in you paying your ex's attorney's fees for having to defend the lawsuit if the judge deemed that appropriate.

    This is intended for educational purposes only and does not create an attorney-client relationship.
  2. Jay Bodzin

    Contributor Level 20

    Answered . Under Oregon law, it is impossible to re-litigate the property division terms of a divorce judgment. One party's foolish mistake (sorry) of not getting a lawyer does not excuse this.

    But if the divorce was in Tennessee, then their law, not Oregon law, controls. You should consult with an attorney licensed to practice in Tennessee. But I wouldn't get my hopes up about this. 17 years is an awfully long time to be living independently; I think most courts would expect you to have taken your own steps towards retirement by now.

    Nothing posted on this site is intended to create an attorney-client relationship. Each case is unique. You are... more
  3. Charlotte Coker Christian

    Contributor Level 7

    1

    Lawyer agrees

    1

    Answered . Advice to all, HAVE YOUR OWN LAWYER...... I would talk to a qualified divorce attorney immediately to learn the laws of your state. Do not feel ditzy or stupid, as people do not realize the consequences of not being represented. A lot of people do this, so do not feel bad. Get a lawyer to consult with you.

    This advice does not constitute an attorney client relationship.

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Divorce is the process of formally ending a marriage. Divorces may be jointly agreed upon, resolved by negotiation, or decided in court.

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