How much information is shared from a divorce mediator to a judge after mediation fails?: my attempt to have mediation work failed and my husband did not negotiate at all. my question is before we go before a judge for our divorce, how much information from mediation is shared with him/her? does the mediator have any weight in decision making process?
Rina’s answer: As Attys Burgess and Silva explain, subject to certain exceptions, communications in mediation are confidential and privileged, and may not be used on a party's behalf in litigation. Therefore, you cannot be held to an offer you made unless it has been made part of a property settlement agreement signed by you and your husband. Likewise, you cannot rely on it to show your husband's unreasonableness. Further, as Ms. Silva states above, the mediator's testimony is limited to procedural information. The mediator does not participate in the court's decisionmaking.
Changing a parenting plan: I think I screwed up. I have a 13 month boy with a man that lives an hour away. I set up the parent plan to where he has him 3 weekends a month, friday-sunday then goes 2 weeks without seeing the father. When I drop my 13 month old off with him he cries and trys to reach for me. It's so heart breaking. He has been seeing his dad on the weekends like this for 7 month and we all lived together from birth-3months. Would a judge change this plan for this reason? Or is the just something my son and I have to get use to.
Rina’s answer: Do you get along reasonably well with your child's father? If so, perhaps you can raise your concerns with him and ask if he would be willing to work on a parenting schedule that would be more appropriate for your son. You may change your parenting plan by agreement without having to show adequate cause. You are, after all, the parents--and you know what is best for your child. If communication with your child's father is difficult, you might suggest mediation. If you are concerned about figuring out the best plan for your son, you may want to consult a parenting coach.
Mediation versus collaborative divorce: Amicable divorce. I'm getting full custody of teenage kids. Looking at just dividing assets Need financial help. What is best and cheapest way
Rina’s answer: I agree with the previous response that mediation is likely to be your least expensive route. Having said this, I would like to add that, while mediators are able to give you legal and financial information, in order to maintain impartiality (so that they do not influence the outcome of your settlement in favor of one or the other of you), they may not give you legal or financial advice. You may need to consult with a financial specialist and/or a lawyer. In the latter instance, I do recommend that each of you pay a Collaborative attorney for his/her counsel and review of documents. Such discrete services are considered to be "unbundled." As such, you are not paying for representation and should not have to pay a retainer.