How to protect assets of a parent with dementia from being taken by a care giver?: My father is 73 and was diagnosed with dementia last December. The dr said it was rather advanced for someone my fathers age. Last fall, he started seeing someone he met online. Since December, this women has changed my dads phone number, changed his health insurance, changed all of his doctors, takes care of his finances, moved him to her house and seemingly controls access to his phone. His friends have reached out to me concerned that they dont hear from much, that texts from his phone are really her and they can’t talk to him without her present. They are concerned she’s after my dads land. My brother and I have the same concerns. We don’t know his current address. We don’t want to go to court to declare him incompetent as he’d never speak to us again. The concern is that she would manipulate my dad into signing it away as his memory issues increase. How do we prevent that and/or fight it in court if it does?
Scott’s answer: Refer the matter to elder protective services. There is only so much they can do, but if he needs to be "declared incompetent" or if there are crimes being committed, they can make the appropriate referrals without you being the named person doing it to him/her.
How to get someone into assisted living?:
I rented a room in my home to a gentleman. I found out after I’d taken him in , he is an at risk adult 61 years old. I went to DSS for help placing him. He needs constant assistance. I am 67. I am trying to sale my home and get a smaller place for me.I was told I can’t revive help if he can shower himself. He can’t read or write or count money. He has been checked and found to have cerbrilo palsy . Sorry about bad spelling. I need help. What should I do.
Scott’s answer:
You may wish to seek the appointment of a professional guardian or conservator for him, who can take over his finances and housing management and help him to obtain the care he needs.
If you are in a purely landlord-tenant relationship, you can evict him in accordance with the law, and you are under no obligation to make sure his other needs in life are met. But if you are worried and do want to help, you have no legal standing to do it. So the best thing to do is get someone appointed who can.
Why can my stepmother not sell us the house for the 150,000?: We have been living in my fathers house for 7 years. Been paying taxes, utilities, HOA, insurance and any repairs. Recently his health has deteriated and they need to sell the house. My stepmother offered for us to buy it for 150,000, its worth around 300,000. Now she is telling me that she can not do that as they are trying to apply for medicaid and they would see that as fraud. We have nothing in writing because she said she wouldnt do it but my father told me the house was mine. It was even in his will that the house goes to me. As of two weeks ago they put the house in my stepmothers name and it no longer is his. I dont know what my options are.
Scott’s answer:
She is generally correct; any sale of assets that is a "sweetheart deal" will be considered a gift of the discount, and Medicaid-covered long-term care will assess a penalty period and hold off on providing care based on the value of the gift. "Fraud" is not the correct word, but what she is telling you is accurate, and normally an attorney would recommend them to put the house in the healthy spouse's name. Your payments toward the house, absent a historic written contract between all of you to the contrary, will be assumed to be payments in lieu of rent, rather than deposits on the purchase or loans, and likely do not allow the sweetheart deal.
There may be applicable exceptions and they should pay for the advice and assistance of an experienced Medicaid lawyer, but if they have done that, what you are being told by her does not strike me as a ruse.