You have an attorney. That is the person you need to talk to about this. There is no general rule about what your claim is worth. A lot will depend on your prognosis for recovery and the amount of insurance available to the defendant. These are things your attorney will be able to explore.
As an emergency vehicle, a funeral escort vehicle may:
"Proceed past a red or stop signal or stop sign, but only after slowing down as may be
necessary for safe operation" C.R.S. 42-4-108(2)(b).
Further, "The provisions of this section shall not relieve the driver of an authorized emergency vehicle from the duty to drive with due regard for the safety of all persons, nor shall such provisions protect the driver from the consequences of such driver's reckless disregard for the safety...
If you don't qualify for the public defender, you need to hire an attorney. This is one of the biggest problems you have in your life right now. It is going to affect you for some time. You need to do everything you can to borrow or raise the money to address it. Your other choice is to plead guilty and ask the Court for a lenient sentence. There really is no third option. You cannot win at trial representing yourself.
If it is your computer then it is probably legal. If, however, she is given temporary or permanent possession of the computer and you do not immediately remove the keylogger, then you risking very serious criminal charges. It is possible that the District Attorney will prosecute such a case. I have seen this happen.
I have no idea what kind of "evidence" you think you will learn that will be helpful to you. It is unlikely you will find anything that a Court will actually pay attention to...
The problem with adding the wife to the lawsuit is that you would have to show that she did something wrong (you can't just sue people because they have more money - they actually have to have harmed you). In order to do this, you would have to have more facts than you outline above. Simply owning a car that is involved in an accident does not make you personally responsible for the damage. Letting your husband drive your car, without more, is not a wrongful act.
If it was negligent to...
You are borderline for being able to qualify for a Chapter 7. Your income might disqualify you - although the analysis is more complicated than can be addressed on this forum.
If you convert, you would likely lose the equity in the rental property. You can protect the equity in which ever property you live in, but if the rental can be sold for a net profit the Chapter 7 Trustee will do so.