The other party asked me to switch his parenting to the specific date that doesn't work for me and I cannot agree. He has sent me many messages to make me to compromise. I would like to know if it's ok not go to the exchange that he suggested as I...
I am so sorry that you are experiencing this. If you two have no parenting plan in place, then there are no rules and you do not have to give into his pressure. If the schedule you reference is part of a parenting plan, the plan’s terms control. As such, if you do not agree to the requested change, you do not agree. A very effective part of communication is knowing when to stop engaging. If you do not agree to the requested change, and have advised of that, then the conversation need only stop. He may keep sending you demands, but you do not have to read them, engage, or show up at the requested modified exchange.
Good luck to you!See question
I have been married for two years and my husband left me after we both had an affair. He drained all of my money from our account and packed up everything in our car and left to go back to New York. I had been following him around with his hockey ...
I am so sorry to hear of your circumstances. For there to be maintenance, the Colorado Court first must have jurisdiction over your husband. With him being out of state, there are some very fact specific answers needed to determine if Colorado will have personal jurisdiction. If Colorado does have personal jurisdiction over him, then maintenance claims are based upon many factors, including your ability to support yourself.
The money in the bank and the automobile are marital property if acquired after the date of your marriage, and not gifted from a third party to one of you. The court can equitably divide those, and all, marital assets, between you and your husband. Don’t write those off just because he took them.
Fees and costs are awarded in dissolution cases based upon relative financial resources, not based upon prevailing party. Usually, you have to advance the fees and costs and seek reimbursement at temporary orders and/or permanent orders. Most firms takes credit cards, and you know the interest rate on your own credit card. This allows you to set up your own payment pan, paying anywhere from the minimum monthly payment up per month.
Good luck to you!See question
I'm estranged from my daughter who is trying to keep me away from my grand son
I am sorry about your circumstances. Colorado has a specific statute for grandparent visitation, but it can only be utilized if there is or has been a legal proceeding relating to your grandchild (such as a divorce, or adjudication of parental rights, or even the death of one of the parents). If one of those facts exist, you petition to intervene and file a motion for grandparent visitation. I will caution you that it is not easy to gain visitation over the objection of a parent. There has been recent case law recognizing the fundamental rights of parents as to the care, custody and control of their children. Their decisions are assumed to be in their child’s best interests, provided they are a fit parent. The burden shifts to you to prove otherwise. I wish you the best of luck!See question
I am a homemaker with two children ages 3 and 5. I found out that when he was younger, my husband molested his two younger sisters. I do not know details. He admitted this to me because one of the sisters had told her therapist who informed her s...
I can understand why you would feel the need to stay in the relationship to protect your children. When you file for divorce, you can file a Motion for the Court to restrict his parenting time, only allowing supervised, based upon the history of molestation you reference, together with the alcohol and anger management problems. The mere filing automatically restricts his parenting time to supervised only. The Court must have a hearing within 14 days, at which you can present evidence from his sister, the therapist, the authorities that were informed, as well as what your husband has admitted to you.
Then, the key to your children’s safety is to have a Parental Responsibilities Evaluator who specializes in risk assessment be appointed by the divorce court. The expert will interview you as well as your collateral witnesses, do some specific testing, and be able to express to the court an expert opinion as to the risks your husband could present to the children. This enables the court to enter orders that best assist your children and their safety.
All of this may sound daunting, and expensive, but it would seem that the children are at potential risk every day that they remain in a home with this man.
Best of luck to you.
Its been 2 weeks now since this happens they answer me ones but that was all what can I do. Shud I just go get her
I am so sorry for these circumstances. You sure can try to go get her, and go armed with your court orders reflecting that you have custody of your daughter. If you are not successful, you can call the police to assist. They are not always willing to get involved though, and sometimes state it is a civil matter. Whether they are correct or not, be prepared for that answer.
Colorado does have a law that allows you to seek enforcement in the civil court that ordered you to have custody. Section 14-10-129.5 requires that the Court rule on the motion within 30 days, and if the court finds on the filings alone that there has been or is likely to be substantial or continuing non-compliance with the parenting time order or schedule, the court can order certain relief. The possible relief includes your ex having to complete parental education programs, an order requiring your ex to post a bond or security to insure this does not happen again, an order requiring make up parenting time to you for the time you lost, and imposing a fine not to exceed $100 per incident of denied parenting time. I suggest you file such a Verified Motion even if you are successful in getting your daughter back through other means. You want to do your best to make sure this never happens again. If you prevail, the court MUST award you your attorney’s fees, court costs, and expenses that are associated with the action you brought under that statutory provision. Best of luck to you!
an bond's an how could I find out he has also bought a boat an two cars do I have right to them
I am so sorry to hear of these concerns. Our courts require each party to make a full disclosure as to all assets and debts, as well as income. As such, the burden is on your husband to make such a disclosure. If there is concern that he is not complying, formal discovery is allowed. For example, request can be made for proof of all retirement accounts he has had in the last 3 years, and whether he has cashed out or sold any assets in the last 3 years. When you combine these requests with bank and credit card statements, his credibility or lack thereof can be tracked. Proof can also be subpoenaed directly from third parties, such as from the 401(k) company and investment company. If all of that still does not bring to surface all of his assets, the court retains jurisdiction for up to 5 years should additional assets be found.
Per Colorado’s statutes, marital property is defined as any asset that is acquired during the marriage, from date of marriage to date of divorce decree. Do the boat and cars you reference fall within that definition? There are limited, fact-specific exceptions, such as inheritance to one spouse. However, the burden is on your husband to prove such separate property claims. Him buying them in just his name is not sufficient to prove a separate property claim.
After the court determines what is marital, per the definition I have provided in the preceding paragraph, the court must equitably divide the marital estate. This does not necessarily mean each party gets a share of each and every marital asset—the court does not cut each asset in pieces. But, each spouse does have a right to the division of the entire marital estate. Usually the court awards certain assets to each spouse, offsetting those values against each other. For example, one spouse may get the equity in the marital home, in exchange for the other getting a comparable amount in the retirement accounts. Sometimes that means an equal division, sometimes it does not. The key is an equitable division.
If you are concerned that your husband cashed out his 401(k), that can be addressed by the court as a marital waste argument. You also need to consider the potential tax ramifications of that. Even if he did it, the tax liabilities is marital. So, you would need some specific orders to addressed responsibility for those tax obligations.
Best of luck to you!See question
I am in the middle of a Very difficult divorce with four Young children, dealing with a spouse with a Cluster B Personality Disorder -and their family. I can only afford to pay my lawyer so much per month (already paid the retainer). Any time ...
What a tough position. This court system is complicated, and the facts you reference make it even more so. You would do your children a disservice if you tried to handle the case all on your own. Luckily, the Colorado Supreme Court has approved attorneys providing unbundled legal services, or limited representation. The best way to think of unbundled legal services is as an opportunity to consult with an attorney on an as-needed basis. The attorney does not enter her appearance as the client’s attorney of record with the court. The attorney only does what is agreed upon with the client, such as only assisting with drafting and brain-storming discovery. Unless agreed upon with the client, the attorney does not attend court hearings, or attend mediation with the client, but prepares with the client in advance of each. It is the client who is responsible for filing her own documents with the court and for complying with all court deadlines and requirements. However, the attorney can assist the client in learning of those deadlines and requirements, as well as preparing the necessary documents for complying. This option can provide the client the opportunity to obtain legal advice and gain an understanding of the complex legal system, rather than go it completely alone due to financial limitations. Good luck to you!See question
I am the father and we have had 50/50 parenting time for the last 4 years. Her husband recently was discharged from the military and accepted a job 800 miles away. She has no extended family in this new state. Her extended family is here in Col...
I need to caution you that you, and she, have an equal burden to prove why your respective positions on the relocation is in the best interest of your son. Colorado has a specific statute relating to this type of post-decree relocation request. There is no presumption for the child to remain in Colorado. Likewise, there is no presumption for the child to be relocated. Rather, the court is to take into account all relevant factors when deciding your son’s best interests.
I find that the best chance at convincing the court of your position being in the child’s best interests is to have a court appointed expert investigate and issue a report. This can be a Child and Family Investigator, or a Parental Responsibilities Evaluator, and each has its own reasons for being preferable in a given case. Also, the report of such an expert can facilitate settlement. A neutral third party who has listened, investigated, and formed expert opinions about your son’s best interests can move one, or both, of you off of your positions.
Best of luck to you!
Previous court order is 50/50. Two children are involved and one child wants to live with father, one with mother. How do they calculate child support?
There is no age at which children in Colorado get to decide their own parenting time. If you and the other parent are not in agreement as to modifying parenting time, then the court must decide what is in the child’s best interests. There are specific statutory factors that the court must consider. One of those is the child’s wishes, but only if of adequate maturity to form such an opinion. The court considers other factors, such as the parents’ wishes and the ability of the parents to put the needs of the child ahead of his/her own. Another hurdle if this modification is based upon the child’s wishes is how the court learns of such. Courts do not usually allow children to testify and frown upon parents who seek to have them testify. Neither parent can simply tell the court what the child allegedly wants, as that is hearsay. The appointment of a Child and Family Investigator can be sought, to ascertain the child’s wishes, as well as if the child’s expressed wishes are based upon a mature position, testify as to such to the court, and to make recommendations as to parenting time in the child’s best interests.
If modification of parenting time occurs, where one child is in the primary care of each parent, two worksheets are run with just one child each, and offset against each other.
Good luck to you!See question
My soon to be ex says that he is going to find the worst father's right lawyer in Colorado. I have no idea how I can protect the children and stand up against him, since he is very wealthy as well. What do I have to do to protect my children and...
I sure hope your husband is putting all of this in writing to you! A parent who threatens these kinds of actions is not putting the children’s needs first, which will be to his detriment in the court system. In essence, in his attempts to intimidate and manipulate you with his threats, he is shooting himself in the foot. It is true that some fathers seek out “father’s rights” law firms, but this, too, can backfire. Those firms can have reputations of focusing on the rights of the father, denigrating the mother, and/or removing the focus from the children – who are to be the focus. Again, this is not putting the children’s needs first. I find that the experts and judges see through all these antics, and in your children’s favor.
Your husband’s tactics suggest that you may need a mental health practitioner to be appointed, to make recommendations as to parenting time in the children’s best interests as well as suggest some interventions/tools/therapies to help their father address his anger and gain emotional intelligence as to the risks his tactics pose to the children’s success. You can take better control of the timing, and resolution, by simply filing the case and forcing forward movement. That sends a strong message that you are not intimidated by his threats. Good luck to you!See question