You might try speaking to dad about these concerns. In addition, it might be helpful to enroll your son in some counseling sessions with an experienced family counselor. Your HMO could refer you to someone. If the situation does not improve, you may also wish to file a motion to modify either the placement schedule, or to put some safeguards in place about interaction between your son and stepmom. In that case, I recommend that your retain an experienced child custody lawyer.
He's wrong. The guardian ad litem is required to account for the child's wishes, though not necessarily follow them. At 7 years old, most children are capable of expressing their wishes and concerns in the right context. The GAL should meet with the child and determine those wishes. The GAL will also speak to both parents and others involved your son's life to do a thorough investigation. Most judges will not allow a child to actually testify in court (which I agree with), so your son's...
The GAL is a lawyer like any other. Although judges generally give the GAL's recommendations significant weight, the GAL must support her position with evidence. If you are proceeding to trial on a child-related dispute, and the GAL is opposed to your position, I strongly recommend that you retain an experienced family lawyer. Not only to represent you and ensure that your position is advocated, but also to ensure that the GAL is required to properly produce evidence supporting her position.
I highly recommend that you work with an experienced family attorney on this matter. You are definitely on the right track, but you also want to be careful how expenses, renovations, taxes, etc. for this home are paid. The large sum of money involved makes it very worth your while to consult with an attorney to avoid unintended consequences.
As a parent, you have certain rights to your children. A non-parent does not have those rights, unless they have been granted by a court in Texas or Wisconsin. You do not indicate whether there is an order granting any rights to the aunt, so that would affect the answer greatly. In any event, you really should work with an attorney experienced in interstate child custody matters, since the rules in those cases are not easily understood.
I strongly recommend that you retain a lawyer. Although you may have text messages, etc., you must be able to submit that information properly as evidence. It is also important that you address the specifics of the legal definition of harassment in a way the court will accept.
You can request a name change but unless the father agrees, the best you could do is hyphenate the two last names. If the father hasn't had contact in over a year, have you considered a termination of the father's parental rights and stepparent adoption by your husband? If the facts are as you suggest, it may not be a very difficult process. I recommend that you consult with a child custody lawyer.
Your reference to a 5 day window, I assume, means it was submitted to the judge for signature by the other lawyer, and you have 5 days to object to the wording. That is common practice. If you believe the submission does not accurately reflect the judge's order from whatever hearing you had, you must object in writing.