I am sorry you are dealing with such a difficult situation. I agree with the other attorneys who have answered your question. You should consult with an attorney who handles divorce matters. There are several options which a prospective attorney can discuss with you, such as spousal support and alimony pendente lite. I hope that you are able to meet with someone and get some answers which will hopefully ease your mind and help you with your transition.
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As the prior attorney stated, unless you have permitted them contractually to withdraw money from your account, they will not be able to withdraw any monies from your account unless they file a civil lawsuit and obtain a judgment against you. At that time, they will still have to take additional steps in order to execute on that judgment.
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As Attorney Fleming stated, it is important to know which state has jurisdiction in this matter in order to answer this question. However, in Pennsylvania, there is a general provision in many custody orders which provides the current non-custodial parent with the ability to speak with the minor child(ren) on a regular basis and for such communication to be unmonitored by the other parent.