I disagree with any absolute analysis that she definitely won't get maintenance or any share of the house. More facts are needed to complete the analysis. While courts are reluctant to grant maintenance in such a short-term marriage, there is ample caselaw awarding maintenance under certain circumstances, for instance where one spouse earns well into the 6-figures. Moreover, if the house was bought during the marriage, then it's marital property subject to division. As such, you're best...
The short answer is no, the father cannot terminate his own parental rights. If he works for the government, then he's a W-2 employment, and the basic child support will be an easy calculation (17% of his adjusted gross income). The father will also be obligated to pay his share of unreimbursed medical, educational & child care expenses. You're best advised to schedule a consultation with a NYC Child Support attorney for a full assessment.
If you have an immediate need for spousal support, you may file for same in Family Court. If you're looking to terminate the marriage, you may also request alimony (i.e., maintenance) within the divorce case itself. To get an estimate of what you'd receive, use the following calculator: http://www.courts.state.ny.us/divorce/calculator.pdf. You should also schedule a consultation with a Bronx Divorce attorney.
Writing a letter to - or calling - the Plaintiff's attorney is insufficient to fromally answer the complaint, as you've found. To vacate your default, you must technically file a motion to vacate your default in the action. You must generally provide a reasonable excuse for your default as well as state a "meritorious defense." I also highly recommend, at the least that you schedule a free consultation with a White Plains Divorce attorney.
First, it is possible to ask for temporary custody. Second, you should definitely not handle a contested custody case on your own. You should immediately schedule a consultation with a Bronx Child Custody attorney.
Yes you can, but must first register the order for enforcement in NJ. Then request that NY SCU communicate with NJ SCU to put in for the license suspension. Call a Rockland/Westchester Divorce attorney for more info.
One hopes that you both served a formal, written Answer on his attorney, and then filed the original with the court along with proof of service. Assuming so, your next step would be to reach out to the attorney & ask what his client's settlement offer is. If it matches what you want, ask that a settlement agreement be drafted. If it doesn't, then make a counter-offer. Schedule a consult with a NYC/Suffolk divorce attorney for a full assessment.
In a divorce case, personal service of the summons is required (FedEx or certified mail service is thus not acceptable). That said, it also depends on what the attorney is trying to serve you with - papers served after the summons has already been served on you may be served via either regular mail or overnight delivery. For a full assessment, schedule a consultation with a NYC Divorce attorney.
You're probably better off attending than not. If the father does show up, then you will look even more bad in not appearing. Moreover, if you qualify, the court may assign you counsel who then may assist you in getting an investigator appointed (who in turn may assist in locating the father). For a full assessment, you're well-advised to schedule a consultation with a NYC Child Custody lawyer.
Formally, you must file a Notice of Appearance with the court, serve a copy on the opposing attorney and file an affidavit of service with the court that same has been served on the attorney. Some information on divorce cases may be found here: http://www.nycourts.gov/divorce/index.shtml. You're best advised to schedule a consultation with a NYC Divorce attorney.