Unfortunately there is nothing that can be done. tie Court system is broken. There are too many cases for to few Judges. when you spouse comes to this same realization you will have a settlement. Until that time your case may linger in court
I definitely agree with Mr. Kallus. There are certain steps that should have been taken since you are an active duty military member. Consult with a matrimonial attorney in Albany, or see if the VA/your branch of the military has an attorney who is experienced with divorces that can assist you.
It is in your best interest to request that the courts order the other party to obey by the terms of your JOD/settlement. Speak with the attorney who represented you during your divorce, or seek new counsel.
If you are not happy with your current representation, you have the right to retain someone else. You should schedule a time to meet with your lawyer in his office to address the lack of communication and his apparent disinterest in your case. Tell him that you need to see action being taken, or else you will be forced to hire a different lawyer. In the meantime, perhaps consider consulting with other matrimonial attorneys who are more aggressive.
You can proceed with an uncontested divorce without representation, however, this isn't always recommended for longer marriages (or those with kids, property and other assets). Interview different lawyers in Buffalo (some offer free consultations), and decide on which path is best for you (uncontested, contested, mediation) as they all have different costs. Additionally, check with the Erie County Bar Association for recommendations to firms that offer reduced rates or are income based.
If you have lived in NY for 6 months or longer, and you meet the residency requirement, you can file here. Your husband will have to be served personally, though, so that will most likely happen in Portugal. Contact a NYC matrimonial attorney to help you with this.