Irwin M. Pollack’s Answers

If you don't address the issue in your Separation Agreement, the Judge will ask you whether you wish to go back to your maiden name. If not, keep your married (last) name and file paperwork to use your "middle" name. Alternatively, go back to your father's last name and go about the process the same way -- file paperwork for a name change. You won't have a problem...

The hallmark principle of the Massachusetts Probate and Family Court is "the best interest of the child" standard. Moreover, children aren't viewed as "title" for which one parent can baragin with against the other. There are two types of custody -- legal (major life decisions) and physical (primary residence). In a divorce scenario, if two parents can work well and communicate (as parenting partners) with each other a joint physical custody arrangement can work well; if not, one is deemed...

You can stay married to her or decide it isn't something that you want to continue (or that it may be contrary to the best interest of your children). If you want to dissolve your marriage, divorce is the legal remedy for this. Best of luck to you.

What was written in your divorce agreement re: future (not past or present) alimony? How long were you married? Who has the children now? These are questions to help any attorney determine whether you have some options to go back in court given some change in circumstances (ie. your former wife's increased earnings). Good luck.

People tend to get confused about what "fault" vs. "no fault" or "contested" vs. "uncontested" means when it comes to divorce. Generally speaking, when you file under "fault" grounds (ie. abandonment, adultery, etc.) that fault must be proven through evidence at trial, whereas a "no fault" divorce means that the two of you have just gone your different ways and agree to disagree. Contested means that the two of you do not agree on the terms of the different issues (ie. custody or support) that...

This type of toxic behavior is unfortunate, but it does happen. Make photocopies of all instances of not listing you as a parent. Keep copies of e-mails...ask the school for copies of notices (and if your ex- won't provide you with same, ask the court for permission to be involved in your child's life with an order allowing the same). Get copies of medical records...cite instances where she has not done what the court ordered. Make her do the right thing.

The fact that the two of you signed it shows your intent. The notarization isn't a big deal. Technically, since it wasn't entered as an order of the court (or as part of a judgment), it isn't binding...but it will go to your former wife's credibility. Make sure the judge knows...even though nothing will happen to your former wife THIS time. It may be enough to get the Judge to see it your way in the future. Good luck.

Unfortunately, most judges won't consider "cheating" a fault for which to punish. In most jurisdictions, a divorce is no different than breaking up a business partnership. Debts and assets are divided. Having a 22 year-old is almost irrelevant because she is considered an adult in the eyes of the law. You should move forward with your plans to "move on." This doesn't sound like a way that you are happy living. Consider this a 50/50 partnership (you helped him at home so he could take care of...

It would appear that if you are not in agreement, there is nothing for you to sign. If you and your spouse cannot agree on a settlement, your case will proceed to trial. My suggestion would be to agree on as many issues as you can, and then seek advice from the judge on those issues you cannot agree on.

The court will typically act (and make decisions) upon the "best interest of the child" standard. There are several factors the court will review in determining this. Which parent will provide the physical, emotional, mental, education that is better? Is one moving just to punish the other parent? Which will spend more time with the child? How can an equitable parenting plan be developed -- using the holidays and Summer vacation to give the child an opportuinity to be influenced by both parents?...