Hi Erin, thankyou for the response. NO, not what I want but they both are like 2 year olds. It escalated to where the police were called and she was taken away on a 51/50. Not the first time (she's a cutter). Theres certainly more to the story but not anything (to me) that would indicate she'd do something to endanger my financial state through being sued because she did something outrageous. I dont force the issue for her coming back because a) I dont know what legal ramifications Ill face from my husband and B) They are like gas and fire...one of them is going to ignite. It would be a fiasco. Im trying to get some counselling so they can at the very least communicate, but that sounds weak at best. He wants this divorce so hes not liable..Im getting tired. Its so much plus Im trying to run a small business..
If you get a divorce and she lives with you, then perhaps the conflict will abate. But your husband will still be financially liable for your daughter (and grandchild) for a couple of years, including possibly child support.
And then there's the possibility of his owing you spousal support if you're separating.
Counseling may sound lame, and with regard to your husband and daughter's relationship it may seem hopeless, but at the very least you two could use some couple's counseling.
It sounds to me like you are being put in the middle and forced to choose between your child and your husband. In my experience, I've not known a good man who put a woman in that position. Children have the right the right to act like two year-olds, adults do not. Follow your gut on this.
Yes, Im between but what I need to know is whether I can remain in the home if divorce occurs and will my daughter's actions, if illegal and liable, have a monetary impact on my husband. He didnt legally adopt her. We're also landed immigrants from Canada, not yet citizens, married 5 years. Can this impact that?
Without the facts, there is no way to answer your question about the home. All I can say is that it depends on whatever agreement you and your husband work out. If you two are separated, and your husband is not her dad, then he is not liable for your daughter. Consult with an immigration attorney to determine liability on the immigration issue. My advice is to take care of your daughter: she is hurting and she is vulnerable - your actions right now could determine whether or not you will have a lifelong relationship with your child.
There is no prenup. We moved into the home together. The deed is in his name. We've been together 10 years. Bringing her back in the home could become volatile without a pre-agreed structure. She will have housing in appropriate maternity home nearby until appropriate and safe changes can be made. On another note; I see my daughter daily and speak with her up to 4 times daily. My relationship with her is not at risk